Well, it has been a little while since I posted last. All I can say is life has been very busy since we moved to Corsicana. Let me try to quickly explain how our life has changed. For the last 4 years, Logan and I have both felt like we don't belong anywhere. For me that caused a lot of frustration and loneliness. When we lived down in south Texas, I told Logan that I wanted to move back to west Texas. I thought that would make me feel better, to go back to where we were happy before. Well, I did not bother to take the time and ask God if this is what he wanted.
So off we went to Pecos Texas. When we sold our house down south, we ended up being taken advantage of and lost everything. All we had left was a pick up, a 1994 Hitchhiker Travel Trailer and $400 in the bank. I had a job waiting for me when we got there but Logan did not have work for close to two months. We lived in a RV park for a month and ended up moving to a friends ranch and lived out there for about two years (miserable years) Every time we would get a little extra money, something would break costing us twice as much as we had in the bank. Then when I was pregnant, the AC went out and it was the middle of the summer. We worked hard and found some land and an old single wide trailer house to move into once Dalila was born.
When it was time for Dalila to arrive, I had major complications and almosted lost mine and her life. Luckily we survived but because of the ordeal, I slipped into a deep depression, which until recently I was not able to snap out of. This really took a toll on Logan and Dalila both. There were some days where I would feel fine but there were many others that it would take everything I had just to get out of bed. And at times, I would drive to work and when crossing over the Highway, I would entertain the idea of getting on that highway and running away. I never did but I did let this disease consume me. I was very rarely happy and neglected the two most important people in my life.Some people were aware of the trouble I was having but many others I tried to hide it from.
So Logan was offered this job here in Corsicana and We decided for once in our married life, to sit down and pray that God would lead us in the right direction, and we put it in his hand. Things continued to fall in place, Logan took the Job and I was granted a transfer (which really suprised me and everyone else). So we told God we were ready to follow him wherever he might lead.
Long story short, we both ended up getting pay raises at work, sold our farm in west Texas and got a good chunk of change to put down on a new house, closed on that house one week ago and had enough to start a savings account again! And this house is big enough so that we could grow our family if God chose to let us do so.
So many times during the last four years I wanted to give up. I just wanted to check out of life, I felt like the turmoil was not worth it. But deep down, something kept me going. What was that? God. He knew what he was doing and he prepared me to receive the many blessings I have since we moved. He has also put me in a place where I can help others.
The amount of joy, happiness and peace I feel now since I decided to start following God and seeking his will outways the turmoil by billions.
Moral: Stay faithful. Stay faithful. Stay faithful. He will bring you through it. And always seek Him. If you want peace, following Him is the only way to receive it.
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